Kids Say, v.17.0

Hannah came home on Friday after career day at school, which she said it was boring.

She told me she had really been looking forward to a session called ‘tech styles’ because she wanted to learn about making web pages and such. I asked her how it went and she said all they talked about was fashion, which I took to mean fashion on the web.

It wasn’t till the next morning while we were sitting at Starbucks and she was telling the wife about it that it all made sense to me. She told her about career day and how boring it was, and that all they talked about in ‘tech styles’ was wool and stuff. It was then I realized the career session was about textiles, not ‘tech styles’. We laughed out loud over our coffee and in typical Hannah ‘fashion’ she shot me the ‘what is so damn funny’ glare.

I love you sweetie, your view on life brings me so much joy, even if it makes you mad when it does. :)

Kids Say, v.16.0

It was Noah’s turn… he has been shaving fairly regularly, about once a month which isn’t bad for a 14 year old, but anyway… He had been using some of my Neutrogena shave cream so we went shopping for a regular shave cream and I picked up some Gillette Lemon Lime.

After the first time he used it he came downstairs to chat. That was when he said, ‘that new stuff smells a lot better than the other stuff, but it doesn’t taste as good.’

What can you say to that?

Kids Say, v.15.0

The funny thing is, she doesn’t even know she is doing it most of the time, but Hannah came out with another winner today.

We were running errands today and were going to get some lunch and then fill up the lawn mower gas tank on the way home. While trying to see if we had anything else on the schedule, she said:

“Are we gonna do anything after we eat lunch and get gas?”

We laughed, she got mad. One day she might get how unintentionally funny she is.

Kids Say, v.13.0

Haven’t had a decent ‘kids say’ in over 6 months but tonight Hannah came out with one.

While winding down from dinner, but still seated at the table, Hannah said, “Do I have a wisp?”

It took me a minute to get what she was saying and I started trying to think of what she meant when she followed it up with;

“I don’t know how to say it, but a kid on the bus says I do.”

I understood immediately what she meant and I broke out into laughter. She gave me one of those, ‘now what the hell is so funny’ looks so I explained it to her.

“Hannah, what the kid on the bus meant is a lisp, and no, you do not have one, at all (she doesn’t).” My wife added in, “If you did, you couldn’t pronounce your L’s” and I finished with “and you would say ‘wisp’ instead of ‘lisp’.”

She gave me one of those, ‘oh, OK then’ looks and one of her little grins, and I knew my laughter was OK until the next time.

Kids Say, v.12.0

Tonight after dinner at my Mother-In-Laws house, we were sitting around just chatting about the days events. I was talking about a website I created for my uncle that was having issues.

“Uncle Peter’s site went down” I said, followed closely by “he texted and asked me to call but since I was in the office and didn’t have his files, I didn’t.”

Hannah, who was standing next to the table with this look of anguish on her face said, “He’s blind!?”

We all looked at her with the, huh? look and I said “what sweetie? Is who blind?” to which she replied, “well, you said his sight went down so I thought Uncle Peter was blind.”

We all laughed, as I tried to explain that his website had stopped working. Hannah got mad because we laughed. Maybe one day she will see the humor.

Out of the mouths of Babes…

Having me as a father gives the children an early education on the fine art of sarcasm, but Hannah hasn’t grasped all the nuances quite yet.

Last night on the ride home from dance class, an NPR correspondent was talking about trying to book a hotel room for the upcoming inauguration and said; “If you want to get depressed, Google Washington D.C., hotels and inauguration.” My beautiful half-full child responded, “why would you WANT to get depressed?”

If she can see that, why can’t NPR? :)

Kids Say, v.11.0… a twofer (maybe 3)

For some reason, the kids have just been funny the last few days, for example:

Last night while on the way to Grandma’s house I was scanning the new Sirius lineup in my truck. I landed on a French station and just for fun, I asked the kids what language they were speaking. Hannah piped up right up, I mean within a second and said “French!” followed closely by a “huahn, huahn, hauhn…” That’s probably not spelled right but picture a snooty Frenchman laughing, very funny stuff.

Well tonight, we went out to eat at a local restaurant and bar that has some great burgers. On Saturday they have live music and Noah, my 12 year old guitar aficionado really wanted to hear the band play. They started at eight so I didn’t make any promises and told him we’d just wait and see if we were going to stay that long.

While we ate, we were talking about what kind of music the band might sing. Considering the neighborhood and the bar I said they might be rock or country. Around 7:30 we were still eating and two guys came in to set up, one guy wearing a football jersey and backwards ballcap and the other a leather coat and cowboy hat. Noah leaned over to me and said “cowboy hats are never a good sign.”

They got the equipment set up and tested, and did the mandatory strumming of the guitars and the “check, check, check” to which Hannah replied, “why do they always play that song.”

We listened for a few songs, there were two acoustic guitars and they did covers, not too bad really. They played Hotel California for Noah and he told me they were doing power cords, like, I would know the difference. On the way out he said “at least they weren’t one of those country bands that make your ears bleed.”

You think they try to be funny or are just naturally gifted like their Dad? ;)